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I'd say all three were untrue.

Apart from the first one, I suspect on the basis of prior posts, you drive like a crazy woman, but let's face it, other road users and pedestrians are scum and damned well deserve everything they get.

Oh, and possibly the third one. But the plan sounds great anyway!



*Checks Garden thoroughly*

Actually you do drive like a crazy woman but old people do strange things at odd times so I think you're in the clear there. ;-)


I am a cautious and alert driver (while going fast). it keeps my car tuned. ;-)


What have you done with my Clematis? Eh??!

Please please puleeeeeese copy every plant receipt you get and post it to her. She'll either go stark staring bonkers, move to Boise, or apologise and be your best friend for ever.

Alternatively, show her the by now bearded and crazy firemen in your dungeon. She'll never question your poppies again...probably.


Honestly, I can just beat her up for you. Give her the ol' one-two punch! (Let's pretend I know how to box.)

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